'Tis the season to be a jackass...

It's funny how life works. Birthdays are a celebration that many hate. Halloween is a holiday where evil ideals such as death are rewarded with sweets. Christmas, the birth of Christ, the day that the mortal being of Jesus Christ was born just so happens to be the time when people are the biggest a-holes to all that come within a specified radius.

Determining the radius, or rather, radi-ass, is rather simple:

Note:

Brow and cheek slumping determine said radius

Objects (people) are denoted as 'X'

• Divide pre-brow by pre-cheek slump
• Multiple the girth of X by the remainder of Pre-brow/Post-brow slump
• Add the square root of Pre-cheek/Post-cheek slump to the product of Pre-brow/Pre-cheek slump
• Subtract the number of days to Christmas

There's your radi-ass.

All of which I preach on this blog has reached a true test. I honestly never realized that Christmas, my favorite holiday, would be the time I would have to work the hardest to practice what I preach. 

I find myself on the reactionary side, getting very angry with people. Every time I leave the house I am finding myself fighting more and more to remember that I have a choice: react emotionally or move on logically. 

I'm learning more and more that very few people think proactively. School does not teach us to think of why others act a certain way. Truthfully, how could any one teach that? It wasn't until I started teaching people how to use technology that I realized people  getting mean and rude about the subject I am teaching is because they don't get it and don't want to appear stupid. It's 100% human nature. I have always done that myself and I never realized it or really knew why. 

It may not be an answer as much as an observation, but people act the way they do at Christmas out of worry of letting down someone they care about. Or at least, that can be most of the reason. Some, I assume, shop because they don't want to hear someone else whine about it.

The above formula takes time to perfect and is highly scientific. Use it with caution.

I like quarters, but I prefer more change...

I am sure you've been on the edge of your seat thinking, "Geez, I wonder what Shawn Finer is thinking about right now?" 

Well folks, wait no longer, here's my thought of the moment.

What causes people to change? The answer is rather simple: Fear.

Now, don't think of this as a bad thing. Some people change in fear of being someone they don't want to be. Some change to ensure their loved one is happy in fear that they will leave. Some change their underwear so others stop asking awkward questions like, "What's the smell?"

It just might be the hardest thing anyone can do. And I am finding that everyone believes they "change" in some shape or form. But I also find that a lot of people's "change" is only temporary. So it really isn't change at all. It's a fad or a phase. True change is an entire new paradigm. True change is so much more than what someone says. It is what someone does (but this is the kicker) -- over a long period of time... for a lifetime, even.

So where does fear play in all of this? Well, people have different levels of fear. Think of a battered wife. Why do they stick with those abusive husbands? I can't really answer that, as I am sure it changes from situation to situation, but then, all of a sudden, after all the weakness and pain they have suffered, they finally leave. It's the point when the fear of being alone is finally topped by the fear of being harmed. Before that point, the fear of being alone, or whatever fear it may be causing them to stick around, was, for whatever reason, just that much stronger.

It's when fear hits that tipping point that a person makes that final choice.

I, like everyone else, thought fear made you weak. It's quite the opposite. It makes someone stronger. You just can't see it until someone goes from living in fear to accepting fear and doing something about it.

And I truly believe it isn't something you can force. Change takes a very long time. There's no end date, no beginning date. There are only milestones you can reach. Except for the underwear thing... change those quickly and often.

What is good in deed is good... indeed...

The best part about doing something nice is expecting nothing in return. So that is exactly what I did tonight just to see what happens. 

I drove to Albertson's tonight and actually thought about whether or not the bums that sit outside once in awhile ever actually get anything from anyone. And on this particular night, there happened to be one there. Here's how the conversation went:

(as many people walk by ignoring him)

"Sir, sir, I don't want no money. I have a daughter whose birthday is on the 28th and I'd like to get her something for it and --" ::I interrupt him::

"Do you really have a daughter or are you just hungry?" I asked.

::a little stunned:: "I'm just hungry."

"Okay, then what do you want?"

"Chocolate cake and Napoleon or Chocolate ice cream."

"Alright, I'll be right back."

"Thank you, sir, God bless you"

He actually screamed that last part through the door. Which might be the reason the managers came out and asked him to leave. While his completely red, blood-shot eyes and slurred speech tell me he isn't going to remember this at all, I was completely shocked at the feeling of genuine appreciation this man had for this cake and ice cream. Well sure, he then asked for a bus fare which I declined, but I kind of expected that... he is homeless, you know.

This leads me to ask myself, "Why were those thoughts in my mind the one night I actually run into a bum at Albertson's?" I mean, I've seen them before, but never have any of them asked anything from me. "Of all the times I've had a chance to do something like this, why did I choose tonight?" I can't honestly even answer those questions. Maybe God said this man needs some pity. I don't know. For whatever reason, I had some for him tonight.

Let's think big picture here. I don't have much. That man had absolutely nothing. It may be of his own doing, I don't know. I can't help but sit here and think of the other day, driving through a rather -- what's the word -- economically challenged part of town and saw two very young girls with barely enough clothes to cover themselves walking next to the highway with their mother. Those kids truly don't have a chance. Maybe that was this guy too. Who knows? It isn't for me to find out. My responsibility is only for myself and maybe I'll never do a good deed like this again, but the power of kindness is pretty amazing.

Reading this back to myself, I sound a bit pretentious, as if I am trying to show off that I did a good deed. This is not my intention with this article. Social responsibility means don't smoke next too an elderly woman with an oxygen tank, not be forced to buy her an inhaler. But if you choose to go that extra step, then don't be afraid to do it.

Happy Thanksgiving everyone.

.... now what?

Before I landed in the consulting field, I always thought of myself as a free thinker. A creator. A do-er with unlimited potential. A true revolutionary with endless commitment to achieve. 

Yeah, I was all wrong. 

When I left college, I thought I'd get out there and take the world in my hands. When that didn't work out, I started to wonder, what is wrong with me? What do others know that I don't? 

I started to look at what I have been taught all my life. Even in college, I, as well as everyone else, was taught to "do as you are told." No more. No less. I knew I was a good worker, employers liked having me around but I was always waiting for something more but never saw any opportunities, then it hit me... I don't see the opportunities because I am not really looking. I'm waiting on someone to hand it over to me, or to tell me how to do it. 

Now, if you are the type of person that wants to be told how to do something, do it and then go home at 5 each and every day, then that is fine. There is absolutely nothing wrong with it. You are the person that keeps this world moving. 

Here's what I suggest, if you are unhappy, search for the real reason. There is very little in my life to be unhappy about, but that doesn't mean there isn't room for improvement. 

If you are trying to become a problem solver, the best place to start is by solving your own problems. It's probably one of the hardest things to do and something that will never end. If I figure out what's wrong with me (doctor's can't... my wife gave up on that one a long time ago) I'll let you know.

"You shut your mouth when you're talking to me!"

There's a well known but seldom discussed disease infesting millions of Americans today. 99% of people know it's a problem but 90% of those 99% don't think it's a problem they have or attribute to... it's called "Rude"

Rudeness is a funny thing. Rudeness is only rude when it's someone else doing it, not yourself. Being rude is an expression of frustration, but nonetheless, it's a choice.

I, Shawn Finer, have indeed been rude a time or two. The funny thing is I remember those moments so well, but not NEARLY as well as I remember those who have been rude to me.

Yet I can't but wonder, if being less than cordial is anything less than unappreciated, why do people do it? It's because it's convenient. What do people do when someone is rude to them? They are rude back.

It's just human nature. Now when you stop to think about it, when you fight fire with fire, everyone gets burned. While I do succumb to this at times myself, I have found a great practice that does something rather wonderful. At the foundation it is still just a selfish act, but stick with it:

Kill them with kindness

This means, don't get rude back. Smile. When that jerk cuts you off and gives you the bird, wave as if saying "It's okay."

It makes you feel great because you didn't lower yourself to their level. But also, and more importantly, it gets them that much more ANGRY. 

It's sickly satisfying, but most importantly, it helps you practice control. You'll sleep better if you control yourself and actually mean it. People will be harsh, rude, crude, or any expletive will do. Doesn't mean you have to be as well.

Kill with kindness and you'll live.

Passive aggressive? Or aggressively passive?

What's the dill pickle? Truthfully, it's a good question. Pun and all.

It's only human nature to try and not dill... sorry... deal with the issues, problems, dilemmas, moral issues, anger and gas pains, but we all know that in some way, those things will deal with us.

But, of course, we believe we only have 2 options:

1. Hold it all in

2. Let it all out

But there is a very unknown, uncommon third option. 

3. Accept it and let it go.

For many, tomorrow is going to be a very bad day. Obama may be elected and the quiet right may soon become very vocal. McCain may get elected and the vocal left may become very quiet. Some will hold it in. Some will let it all out. And the lucky few will accept it for what it is and let it go.

I'm really hoping I can be in the lucky few. I know they exist and I know I can be there but sometimes human nature gets the best of everyone.

The third option doesn't always make it better, but it helps you progress, move forward. I found myself pissed off at the world this weekend. I found myself so angry with "stupid ass people." Sadly, I believe it still, but what am I to do? I can't change them. I can't change what's happened in the past so now I have to do something about it.

It's all up to me now.

And as for dealing with gas pains... option 2 is usually the best way to go...

What the devil?

Halloween is my least favorite holiday. I'm not sure what it is about it.

Actually, I know exactly what it is about it. I used to like Halloween because I loved free candy. In college, Halloween was just one of 365 reasons to drink and go to parties. Now that I have grown from that (unfortunate, yes, but it has happened), I am disgusted by the amount of gore.

When a sugar-filled, greedy little crapper walks to my doorstep, pushes a button and blood start gushing down their face, I just can't help but feel a need to slap the parents across the forehead. I'm not an overly sensative guy, but the idea of death being glorified is very bothersome. You go to the store and it used to just be some skeletons and bats but now it is life-like heads impaled on pitch forks. It's sick!

I appreciate the adorable little princess that come across once in awhile, but overall, I just can't justify this holiday. I had pumpkins on our porch and a week later they are smashed in the street. The sad part is, it's expected at this time of year.

Soon I may have children. And when I do, my little craphead will get the candy and then I'll eat it.

Say hello to my little friend

Ever wondered what it'd be like to receive a letter from yourself about your future in the present. My wife did that, it's quite interesting really. I mean, think about it. If you REALLY want to know how much your life has changed, what better way to do so than to think about when you were 10 years old and then write a letter to yourself telling you about your life. Let's see how I do:

Dear 10-year-old Shawn,

You will eventually lose all that weight... well for awhile. A long while even. In middle school you are going to be living on the other side of the country. It will be cold but it will be happy. Be ready for rough times when you first get there, but then it gets good. You'll move again, it won't be so good. Then you'll move again and be happier than you ever imagined. 

Stupidity will be second nature. As a result, you'll end up in the hospital with a 13-inch skull fracture. But it leads to having a girl in your life throughout high school. It won't be the best relationship but you'll later learn that everything happens for a reason. Without the bad, you can't have the good and when you go off to college, you'll easily recognize the good.

You'll marry your best friend. She'll be taller than you, smarter than you and all around you'll wonder how the hell you landed her. The good lasts a long time, but you'll again need a reality check. You'll be hit by the real world and not handle it all that well. But she will pull you through but you will know better than to forget all that she has given. 

It seems like it's a long time coming, but it'll be here before you know it. At 26, you'll feel no older than 18, but people will start referring to you as "sir" and Mr. Finer. You'll start getting annoyed at loud music and going to bed at a reasonable hour will sound nice.

Maybe I should leave the last part out...

So little Shawn, enjoy it while you can. You are going to have a wife, house, cats and debt before you know it. The best is yet to come!

Oh and don't worry about that place and the thing where that stuff happened.............. just kidding.

A Declaration of Dependence, The Great Paradigm of the Whining Lazy Ass

"We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness."

I couldn't agree more.

But I fail to see where "pursuit of Happiness" has become the responsibility of the government. Or where people see "Liberty" as the governments to control rather than support. Or where "Life" is for the government to provide for rather than protect.

Take care of yourself and stop relying on our government. A lot of crap is getting expensive and things are getting scary, so instead of looking to the feds and saying "How are you going to make me happy and solve my problems" look in the mirror and ask that same question. 

Scan back over control and honesty. You can only control what you can control and the only way to know what that is, you have to be honest with yourself. Fear will remain, but at least you can try to be proactive for yourself rather than reactive to our government.

Take some friggin' responsibility for yourself. There's help, but help should be a crutch for you to get back on your feet, not another leg that you depend on each day. You want help?? Then help yourself. You are the only one who knows what you need. Get outside help when necessary, but don't depend on it.

People need to stop thinking they are owed something just because they were born. Stephen Crane's poem explains that rather well:

"A man said to the universe:

'Sir I exist!'

'However,' replied the universe,

'The fact has not created in me

A sense of obligation."

Keep in mind, I am not telling people not worry. In fact, I am stating quite the opposite. Go do something to take care of yourself. If you need help, there are those who are willing. If you can be the one to help others, do so. Don't be a victim. Be an American.

Thank God for our government and God Bless America. Now get off your ass and do something.

I'm Shawn Finer and I approve this message.

The sky is falling. The end is near. Panic! Panic! PANIC!

Oil is high. A financial crisis is upon us. Inflation is up. Employment is down. The New Kids on the Block are reuniting. All the signs of dooms day face us now.

Or maybe, just maybe, things will get better.

Keep things in perspective. Hell, bring it back to the control. What can you control? How about YOUR OWN SPENDING?? If you want to keep spending, then plan for what you are going to lose or, at least, not generate, later on. Face the consequences of your actions.

If you are going to eat crap food, expect to get fat. Hell, enjoy it for a little bit. You will just have to face the consequences later. I do it myself.

Calling for dooms day and panicking is really just an excuse to not do anything. People cry and scream until someone comes and cleans up their mess. If you don't believe me... try to work in the IT industry for awhile.

Or heck, just try being my wife!

I'm running for President.

And I'll lose.

Why so pessimistic, you may ask? In celebration of tonight's debates between Senator Obama and Senator McCain, I couldn't help but try and picture myself in position of one of the candidates. I don't believe I am the smartest man, but when I am looking for a solid leader, pretty rhetoric does not give me the hoobalie joobalies like sound logic does.

There is just no way I'd be able to remain quiet as a candidate uses 2 words that mean 2 different things interchangeably. I wouldn't be able to control my smartass remarks. These candidates are just too easy. I appreciate the professionalism, but come on, it's time to be real. When your opponent says something stupid, let's start comedic jabbing. Let's see some rolling eyes, shake your head in disgust, heck, just right "WTF?" on a piece a paper and hold it up to a camera at opportune times. THAT would make for a great debate.

We should have bikini-clad models holding up score cards. I think there should be some college  kids playing beer pong in the background (Come on, it was Ole Miss!). I think having those guys from the show Wipeout drawing over the screen with voiceovers would draw in the American public just that much more.

But what about the issues?

Economy: I will decrease the increase by increasing the decrease by dividing up the tax brackets into 1 bracket of 6 brackets of a unified brackateer. I'll call it Bracketing so that no one will bother asking me what the hell I'm talking about.

Iraq: Finish the war and win it, but don't make it last any longer. I don't want my children to be paying the debt of a war they don't fight even if that means they will have to fight a war later that we don't finish, it's not selfish, it's just self-concerned.  I'll call it Iraqi War Backward-Progressings so that no one will bother asking me what the hell I'm talking about.

And my advisors consist of a palm pilot and my garden gnome and of course, my opponent, Timpleton the Great, also known as my cat. 

If you want change, I'll bring you change.

Shawn Finer for President 2028

The ERCO Agreement

You know, I mentioned that I was not a good salesman but it turns out I am a seriously good negotiator.

As of today, even in the wildest of economic times here in the US, there is a beacon of hope. A bright light to guide our way. This accomplishment shows that ANYTHING in this world is possible. And what is that?

The ERCO Agreement.

It stands for Extended Relationship Contractual Obligation. After my wife and I got married she said I only had 2 years or it was over. So, I did what I had to do and today, our 2 year anniversary, I convinced her to renew our ERCO Agreement.

Not only did she renew, but she even agreed to 3+ years! How amazing am I to pull that off?

Now, don't you think for a second that I am going soft. But I am going to get serious for a minute:
I love my wife, Laura, more than anything in the world. She deals with my strange sense of humor, lifts me when I am down and stuck by me in the worst of times.

And yet, I can't help but fart on her.

If it's a rumor on the internet, it is SO real!

The point of ridiculous has passed. We are now at the point of atmospheric retardation. The Internet with its vast cyber world of knowledge has also become a vast cyber world of lies, deceit and hilarious rumors that people actually believe. Let's start with the current presidential race. Disregard the fact that it's apparently been a Capitol Hill rule of thumb to not forcibly attack the running mate of your opponent (maybe this is part of the "change" Obama is talking about), the rumors that run about Sarah Palin are so ignorant and laughable. The only part that's not funny about these rumors is that people believe them... no matter how preposterous. Keep in mind it goes both ways when it comes to politics, but I'm surprised at the absolute desperation that wreak from Obama supporters that lead to asinine and absurd stories.

But this isn't a political blog. It's merely a recent revelation that has bestowed itself upon us in our daily expectation of internet procrastination.

So what is the problem with the internet then? It's too fast. For centuries upon centuries, the world waited in anticipation for 6 months to have a new book. Now we have a new website probably every 6 seconds (if not faster). It's awesome. It's incredible. But it's hilariously dangerous. Mostly because I believe people could be more rational, make smarter decisions and well... make their OWN decisions, but people choose not to. If it's on a blog by an anonymous writer in Peru, well what reason do I have not to believe it?

Even right now at Facebook.com there is a new group protesting the new Facebook layout titled "IF 10 MILLION JOIN MARC ZOMBERG WILL BRING BACK THE OLD FACEBOOK!"
Uhhh.... there is no Marc Zomberg. The owner of Facebook is named Mark Zuckerberg. But this hasn't stopped 616,449 people from joining this group as of 4:45 p.m. today believing this will actually happen. That's well over 100,000 people since I realized today at noon that this group exists.

Now if you send a link to this blog to 125 of your friends in the next 10 minutes you will get $1,000 from Microsoft and will receive 17 years of the greatest luck anyone could imagine. If you fail to do so, you just might die in the next 38 minutes. So hurry!

Case of the Mondays or a case FOR the Mondays?

No one likes to have a case of the Monday's so I propose: A Case FOR the Monday's

Think about it. Hating Monday's means you are definitely going to be hating 1/7 of your life. That's 14.29% of your life that you have predetermined NOT to enjoy. So what's the best kind of case to have? A case of beer. 

I went to work today thinking "Great, it's another Monday" and suddenly it dawned on me. Why are Monday's so bad? It's because of work. The thing that I realized is, who cares? If not for a job, I couldn't buy beer. If not for beer, I couldn't enjoy Monday's. 

The circle of life continues. 

And now I just took back 1/7 of my life!

The only thing I can control is the remote and even that is questionable...

There is a funny thing in life that everyone thinks about and that is control. What control do we really have? Truthfully? You'd think maturity and age gives people control but if that were the case, there would be no need for Depends.....

It's interesting to sit back and look at those who "control" things. We the people "control" who will be the next president. Sure, on a grand scale that ignores individuality, that is true. But hell, I'm an individual and all I can control is my one vote. No one will change because I said so. No one will say I am right no matter how right I am. The government has a lot of control, sure, but only as long as they don't piss people off enough to revolt. Control is a faulty thing. Control isn't really power, it's perception. Maybe perception is power, maybe the use of power creates a perception. In the end, it doesn't really matter because people will do what's best for themselves and a collective of common interests will take hold. But guess what... I have no control over what the collective of common interest will be. And neither do you. Control is a short-term ideal. It doesn't last, which only shows, control doesn't really exist.

So, what does this brilliant piece of rhetoric mean? That the only thing I can ever control is myself. And as I said above, even that can be lost over time.

This doesn't mean that there's no hope. It just means take care of yourself. Treat others how you want to be treated and stop worrying about things you can't control. Trust me, you'll be much happier if you do.

Boo - AHH!!!

While cooking, a spoon flies across the room and lands 6 feet away. The air gets dense and the faucet turns on by itself. It's not too soon after that the refrigerator opens with no hands touching it. The fan turns on when someone says they are hot and a hand grabs your shoulder... when no one is in the room.

This is a great horror movie... oh wait, no, it's what happens in my home.

The name is Mildred and I am Shawn's house ghost.

My kind of political party? A Toga Party!

I am conservatively conservative... or perhaps its liberally conserving conservatism? Conserberal? Republican because the other option is Democrat while the other 3rd parties are really just as hypocritical and full of politicians. 

I am careful about my conservatism. I try very hard to think of things logically... not just what makes sense to me but about what other people will react to, how they will react and why they will react which brings me to my philosophy on people --- as a whole, people are panicky and stupid. The individual can be reasoned with, but the masses react rather than listen. 

Don't believe me? You should visit Texas Tech football game...

Which brings me to my next thought... my house is haunted.

Tomorrow's forecast: Old.

I am about to be less than half a decade to 30 years old. I never thought the day would come. Sure, sure, I'm 26, no one feels sorry for me. But that won't stop me feeling sorry for myself! Okay, I'll avoid the pity party and let's reflect upon all the years.

1 decade ago I was:

- Just about to get my driver's license

- Trying to grow a beard

- Playing high school football

- Trying any way to find beer

 and I still had things to look forward to:

- Getting into Rated R movies

- Voting

- Buying Playboy

- Alcoholism/College

And now look at me. Washed up. I'm getting bitter which only shows my age. I just can't win and my damn hip is actin' up again dag-gum-it. Take me out to pasture, I'm done for! 

This goose is cooked.

There's no such thing as a free lunch

Mostly because if someone is willing to give you something for free, it's because they want to get rid of it.

You get what you pay for. There's a reason that green meat is having a "quick sell sale" at the local grocery store. Even if that green meat were free, it's gonna cost you something... most likely in the form of a very large hospital bill. But I must say, the beds really are quite comfy...........

The idea of paying someone close to nothing for a highly sought after skill is not only a joke but it's an insulting joke. Negotiations are a funny thing. Using big numbers to try and represent a big win when really it's a huge loss really just cracks me up. Do people really fall for it? I guess they do. I think Nigeria's entire economy is based on stupid people. Hm, I'll have to ponder this.

While I'm gone, come up with an answer to this:

If a tree falls in the forest but no one is around to hear it, will a Republican be blamed?

Appreciate what you have, there are hungry children in India(na)

I love football.

All right, now down to business. The other day I was sitting around and started to wonder "what is it that is really missing from our yard?" We have new grass, plenty of flowers and plants and all that crap and then it hit me... no not crap... an idea.

A wise man once wrote a Bud Light commercial that said "A home isn't a home, without a Gnome" I just could not agree with that any more. My home, just isn't a home, without beer.  Thank you Bud Light.

Which leads me to my next thought ... There was a time in my life when I was a cocky bastard. I know, it may seem so hard to believe. Want to know what changed it all? Honesty! I don't expect you to know what I mean, but stick with me here. No matter how much I tried to be that quick witted, trendy, over-confident guy, it really just wasn't me. I took a step back, looked in the mirror and realized, man, I am gaining weight. But then I thought, "Wow, I have no desire to be that guy." And why not? Because I am NOT that guy. I am overly nice and I don't want to change that. I am not a good salesman. I am always going to be the guy that can't fight the urge to help someone. I still hate those damn door-to-door solicitors. I will never receive those magazines so get the hell of my porch!

One year ago I was unemployed. I never had a job I liked. I was sick with stress. The whole honesty thing fixed it. Well honestly, I'm still working on it much like everyone else. But it doesn't change the fact that I decided to figure out who I really am and use it to my advantage rather than trying to change or fix it. Can't fix something that isn't broken. To use one of my many special metaphors, before I was a hammer, but I wanted to believe I was a shovel. It wasn't until I accepted the fact I am a hammer, that I stopped trying to dig and figured out what I was good for.

Don't worry, the metaphors get better!

Ah, the words of wisdom

It was about a year and a half ago that I was let go from a job. It's safe to say I was rather devastated by this. Ah, yes, Shawn, while he has the prowess and amazing features of a Greek God is, in fact, at times, down and out. My father provided me with words of wisdom that I can only repeat and bestow upon the world these words of wisdom. Here's how the conversation went:

Me: Dad, this just sucks, I hate it.

Dad: Well, Shawn, life sucks. You hate it so much, take a bike and ride in front of a truck.

Me: (Laughing) No, I don't think I'll do that.

Dad: Well then quit your bitchin', you have options.

Funny how after that, those words have stuck with me this long. 

I like to think I am now a centered person... and no it has nothing to do with my growing gut. I've tried to take those words "quit your bitchin', you have options" and adapt that to my life. I have choices that I can make. I can work all the time. I can enjoy my life when I am home. I can find that work/life balance. In fact, that's what I have done. 

Think of your current situation. Can you get out of it? SURE YOU CAN! My dad proved that to me on this night. 

So where do I go from here? I think bed. Tomorrow is a new day. So now I am faced with the choices I spoke of just above -- do I fart toward or away from my wife under the sheets?

What brought me here?

It's a question that I really can't answer. Think of the possibilities:
- Divine intervention
- Peer pressure
- A need for instant gratification
- A severe need to share my innermost secrets
- or maybe I'm just bored.

For whatever reason, I just feel inspired. It's like watching monkeys use a computer for the first time. The result was disasterous but at least someone gave it a shot... so here I am!

Just incase someone other than my friends read this, you may want to know something about me. Not that anything about me is above average or impressive but I think I have some qualities that leave me memorable or at the very least recognizable.

I am:
1. short
2. married
3. an IT consultant
4. white
5. broke
6. about to turn 26 (September 9)
7. still figuring things out

I don't think my situation is far off from most but it's just a situation that is different. My life is only my life and some people may be able to say "I know what you mean" but that doesn't mean they understand.

If you are curious what I am going to talk about, well so am I. My life, attitude and really just about everything about me has changed rather drastically over the last couple of years. Things from college graduation, marriage, home ownership, job lay-offs etc etc have brought me to being the person I am. Expect a lot of deep thoughts and aspirations. Hopefully my inspiration will lead to inspire... or expire... depends on the person!