I came across some interesting stuff lately. It's about having an impression or thought about someone. Really, what I've concluded and was also confirmed by my boss, is that people are actually very perceptive... and they don't even realize it.
Think about it, when you think someone is stupid or wrong or some other negative perception you could have toward someone, you may act as if none of those things are true and that person will, some way some how, see it. It's something so subtle in your demeanor that you don't even think the person will notice. But the fact is, the person notices.
Tiny facial expressions, mildly forced smiles, so on and so forth, cannot be hidden for long. People notice this stuff.
In the past, I've dealt with people who I had negative thoughts about, and low and behold, the relationship deteriorated more and more. Then recently, I decided to change that. I took those negative thoughts and made them positive. I started to empathize and soon I was UNDERSTANDING why they said/thought what they said/thought. With that understanding, I began listening. With that listening, the subtleties that hurt the relationship before virtually vanished.
My wife tried this with me. She still can't stand me.
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